Auditions, models and ESL

I self-submitted on some projects and received an email inviting me to audition for a short film. I got the sides and the character breakdown and spent the next day reviewing everything and really let the character sink in. I was lucky to have 2 days to prepare and felt ready to go on audition day. I took some extra time so I wouldn’t be rushed and of course, the bus was late, the subway was delayed and I got off at the wrong stop in a panic. Awesome start.

I managed to arrive just on time and as I was walking into the casting studio, a tall, gorgeous blonde model type walked in ahead of me and I ran up to catch the door behind her. She paid no attention and so I arrived just in time to have the door slam in my face.  I cursed at this glamazon and made my way to the studio. As I walked around the corner, I walked into a waiting room full of models – blondes, brunettes, tall, thin, holding their portfolios in their laps. Great, I thought, I have to wade through model land to get to my audition. I saw a sign in desk just beyond the blonde who had slammed the door in my face and walked over to find out where the audition I was there for, was. “Oh.” said the receptionist, “you found it. Just sign in here and you can take a seat with the other girls behind you.” I’m sorry…whaaaaaatt??? I’m auditioning for the same part with the model casting behind me?? This day gets better and better.

I squeezed in next to two models and one of them smiled at me and said, or tried to say “Hi, nice to meet you. I’m Sasha and I’m here to read for the Rebecca role.” What she actually said in a very thick German accent was: “Hi, nice meet you. I Sasha. I here to take Rebecca part.” It took me a second to translate the broken English but then it dawned on me, all these glamazons were also reading for Rebecca. I wondered if there was some mistake on my resume…did it accidentally read that I was 5″10 and not 5’3″? Or maybe they meant to reply to someone else via email and boy were they in for a surprise.

One by one, the girls were called in and I realized that if I leaned up against the wall, I could actually hear their auditions. The majority of them clearly did not speak English very well. I could hear them ad lib their lines and hear the CD ask them to try it again and at times, coach them through their auditions. I could hear them giggle and chat with the CD and it actually helped me  feel much more confident.

Finally my turn came. I went in and the CD glanced up and there was no chit chat, just “OK, whenever you’re ready.” In my mind I nailed it. I knew my lines, I really took on Rebecca and let her breathe through me. I felt great. I waited for the CD to ask me to try it again. Instead she looked up and said “Ok thanks.” No emotion, no smile, barely a glance in my direction. That was it. I wondered if I should have feigned an accent and pretended to not speak English. In and out in 2 minutes. That’s just the way it is. As I walked out, Sasha was being walked in and a few seconds later I heard her let out a giggle.

I made my way back down the hall and had to dodge a girl power walking towards me. She was petite, short bob, funky glasses and she stopped me to ask if I happened to know where the audition room for the film I just auditioned for was. I told her when she meets up with American’s Next Top Model, she’s found it. She gave me a weird look and made her way past me. I opened the front door to hear a “Are you friggin kidding me??” from the hall behind me. She found it. I should have told her to fake an accent.

Oh the glamourous life.